Have a Lover, Got Love? No Got Love?
by Cat Wilson and Scott Yeager
February is here. The month of love means different things to different folks. If you have a lover in your life, you could relate to February with joy and anticipation. If you don’t have a love interest, this could be an angsty time. You might be looking at happy couples with envy, or feeling pressure to pair up when flying solo suits you just fine.
There are different kinds of love, and the usual ideal of Valentine’s Day isn’t the whole story. I’ll be partnering with professional writer and poet, Scott Yeager, who’s Apositiva’s resource for writing, editing, and digital marketing.
As a caveat, I’m not a love doctor or a scientist who studies mating behavior, but I have been in love, out of love, and learned how what looks like love to one person can be something different to another person. Scott comes from a younger generation and brings a different set of views. We hope to serve some food for thought from our two perspectives, a little entertainment, ideas about love, and perhaps a path you’d like to explore.
Let’s begin with organic love.
What is a love that is organic or natural as compared to inorganic love? I suppose genetically modified love could be stated as inorganic. This could be taking a love potion or being shot by Cupid’s arrow.
Organic love is natural. It may occur in a natural space, such as walking through a nature preserve, park, hiking through the mountains, or on a beach. When you are out among plants, trees, flowers, and animals, you breathe in nature and get a connection to the space and place.
Feeling a flow of natural joy and appreciation, and even gratitude, you look up and there is a person looking back at you. Maybe you’re both walking a dog, or simply hanging with nature. The effect of the blissful beauty of your surroundings naturally shows as a relaxed face and body, maybe even a smile breaks.
Feeling a sense of peace, your humanity instinctually recognizes a safe human connection in a paradise made by Mother Earth.
Trusting Instinct of an Animal
If you are walking a dog or another person is walking one, you look at the happy pet and you can’t help but stop to appreciate love in a natural mode of mutual admiration. If the animal feels this way about that human, they must be lovable, right? I wonder how it would feel to share that loveable feeling? Pets offer a natural love. Nothing artificial here. You can’t make an animal love you. Either you earned the love or they’re afraid of you. It says a lot when you see the adoration in a pet’s demeanor toward their master/mistress. You can trust them.
If it’s a pet-less person you meet on the path in the forest, and you too are walking alone, you may both feel that deep connection to nature, beauty of the earth, and awe. Seeing awe in another person’s face is like being soaked in happiness and wonder. Watching gratitude and appreciation for what a bird can do in a nest with sticks, string, and something shiny makes you smile. Pausing before flowers and appreciating the blooms making their way with delightful pops of petals and fragrance can brighten the wettest and gloomiest days.
Awe in the eye lights up the soul. Awe brings wonder, and connection with other worldly things, like love. Connecting in a space or place when fun and entertainment and learning are happening can bring an “Ah ha!” What a privilege to be with another, opening to the wisdom and brilliance of a new idea. You are both part of a spark!
Organic love can be a part of you from the chemistry part of being human. You sense someone attractive and oxytocin, the love hormone, goes streaming through your system, turning off other competing thoughts as your biology turns to deep biological calls, such as, “Hello, potential mate!”
Let’s leave this conversation here, and remember a couple points.
You can have organic, inorganic, or natural love. You can fall in love as a person strolling in a natural place of beauty, loving the environment.
You can see an animal’s love for a human and on a deeper level know this person can be trusted.
You can connect in an environment for fun and be part of a spark.
We’ll explore another aspect of love next time, such as what keeps us from expressing our love out in the open.
Got Love? No Got Love?
Wanting to communicate better with those you love?
o Find your words
o Communicate how you feel and grow love
o Learn about love languages
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